Monday, April 21, 2008

Randy Jackson



No, I’m not referring to the guy from “American Idol”, or Michael Jackson’s brother, but rather to the person who, in one instant, single-handedly restored my faith in the human race.
Alex and I just ate dinner at Denny’s. We can rarely afford meals out these days, but Denny’s has a “Kids Eat Free on Tuesdays” promotion that I like to take advantage of every once in a while. Alex, like all little kids I’m sure, finds dining at a restaurant an exciting diversion from the boring, nutritionally-balanced meals at home, partially because of the fact that when we’re eating out, I don’t nag him about eating vegetables and drinking milk. I just let him get whatever the hell he wants- no matter how unhealthy, and he just loves it. Also, I certainly don’t mind the break from cooking and washing dishes. Anyway, we’re sitting in our booth, and I was sipping my ice water patiently waiting Alex to finish his fries. All of a sudden, our waitress, Sue, comes over to our table, informing us that the man who just left paid our check. She asked if I knew him, and I said no. I had noticed him over the previous 45 minutes or so because the place was virtually empty, and he passed by our table twice, and both times, we made eye contact. Nothing serious or flirtatious, just eye contact. I was completely baffled! I was shocked, flattered, confused, surprised, and impressed all at the same time. Sue went around telling the rest of the Denny’s staff that this man just paid my bill and that I didn’t even know him; everyone seemed equally as bewildered as me.
Being a woman, I have had strange men send me a drink from across the bar, or offer to pick up the tab after a drunken evening, but for this stranger to simply pay our bill and then disappear without wanting anything in return, was simply incredible. I left the restaurant not more than 3 or 4 minutes later, part of me thinking he’d be waiting (like most guys, probably wanting something in return) to ask me for my phone number or something, but he was gone- completely vanished. He wasn’t looking for even a simple “thank you”; he just wanted to do a good deed for another person: me.
Maybe I’m reaching, but it’s people like this Randy Jackson (I know his name because the waitress looked at his credit card receipt), who remind me that there are people out there performing acts of God. I’ve had a few experiences in my life where I truly felt that God sent someone into my life at a certain moment, for a certain purpose. There are two other times in my life where a complete stranger, appeared and then completely disappeared, while managing to make a lasting impact on my life and on the decisions I make. Once was about 4 years ago. I was in a local bar with Vanessa, an old friend from high school. We were catching up, shooting the breeze over a couple of beers, when out of nowhere, this man helps himself to a chair at our table and begins a conversation. We had not noticed him the entire evening, despite the fact that the bar couldn’t have been any bigger than my living room. As soon as he sat down, he looked straight into my eyes, and asked me if I “treat my body like a temple”. I thought this was incredibly odd, and Vanessa was completely disgusted at his bold, and extremely forward question. I thought for a second, and then responded, “no, sometimes I don’t”, which was the truth. At that point in my life I felt a complete lack of love, self-esteem, and self-respect, and I did a few things I’m not proud of. Nothing horrible, but I was behaving in a way that was not responsible or respectful to my body. I was going out drinking, making out with random guys, and degrading myself by allowing men to treat me as little more than a sex object. Anyway, this strange man’s bold question was a changing point in my life. I didn’t want to continue the road I was on- a road of drinking, partying, and “hooking up” with people I had no intention of seeing again. It was disgusting, and it disgusts me when I see people going out and doing things like that as if there’s nothing at all wrong with it, or worse- that it’s actually a “cool” thing to do. Luckily, my “phase” only lasted a couple months, but if this man hadn’t been as blunt and straightforward, asking me the one question I was afraid to ask myself, maybe I would be on a completely different path right now. Anyway, so after I answered him, he rambled on for about ten minutes, mainly about the importance of treating your body like a temple the way God wants you to, respecting yourself, and living a good, Christian lifestyle. Then, he was gone. Just as quickly as he had sat down at our table, he was gone, nowhere to be found. I truly felt then, and I still feel now, that his presence at the bar that night was no accident. It was fate, part of God’s plan, that he approached me and asked me that one very important, life-changing question. Almost overnight, I began treating myself and my body as the temple God wants it to be.
The other time was about two years ago. I am really ashamed to admit this, but I was out at a friend’s house one night and decided to drive the 10 miles home, despite the fact that I was extremely drunk. I thought I’d be ok to drive, but within seconds of leaving her house, I knew I shouldn’t have been behind the wheel. Concentrated and focused, I miraculously made it to my street. I was sitting at the light, turned left, and coasted the two blocks to my parking spot, thanking my lucky stars (and God) that I was safe. The very instant that I put my car in park, some random guy (who sort of resembled the strange man from the bar), pops up and is right on my driver’s side window. He scared the shit out of me, to be honest, and I contemplated staying in my car until this weirdo walked away. He said simply, “man, you were two seconds from getting pulled over”. I had no idea how this man would know that I was drunk, since I looked fine, had pulled myself together, and had parked without incident. I was taken aback by his comment, asking him what he meant. He said, “there was a cop on Chippewa, about to pull you over.” I didn’t admit to him that I had been driving drunk, I was just thankful that I didn’t get pulled over, and I was wondering how the hell this man, two blocks down from Chippewa, knew that there was a cop. I gathered my purse, water bottle, and keys from the car, ready to make my way up the steps and onto my porch. Before I even closed my car door, however, not more than 10 seconds later after looking the man in the face three feet away, I noticed him walking, his flannel shirt blowing in the wind at least 50 yards away. How he knew there was a cop, how he knew I was drunk, and how in the world he got so far, so fast, I have no idea. Just as I put my keys in my front door lock, a police car drove by. It was all so eerie and unexplainable, but because of this one incident, I haven’t driven after drinking since. This strange encounter had a lasting impact on me, and again, just like the man in the bar, I feel that this man was there, in my life, at that precise moment, for one specific purpose. It was no coincidence or mere accident. It was God.
While Randy Jackson picking up my tab at Denny’s may not be life changing, it certainly came at the right time for me. I feel so alone, so worthless sometimes, so for someone to do something so sweet and generous for me, really restores some self-worth that I seem to lack at times. At times, I feel so bitter and negative about the people of this world. It really upsets me that people are so focused on material possessions. We have become such a shallow, superficial society, and sometimes, I feel completely hopeless of finding people who are interested in more than what they look like, what car they drive, or how fat their wallet is. It has been so long since I have witnessed such a selfless act. It literally brought tears to my eyes as we drove home. I think I needed something that would restore my faith in the hope that there are people out there like Randy Jackson. People who put others needs ahead of their own. People who reach out a helping hand without wanting restitution. People who sacrifice their time, effort, or money to do something special for someone else. The fact that someone when out of their way for me, truly means the world.

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